


It’s Not Easy to Be Me

by Innwich



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Superheroes/Superpowers, Angst, Break Up, Exes, M/M, Superhero Castiel, Superhero Dean, Superhero Sam, Wings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-10
Updated: 2014-08-10
Packaged: 2018-02-12 15:24:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2114979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Innwich/pseuds/Innwich
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Superheroes weren’t always invulnerable. After a bad breakup, Dean had to deal with an ex that wouldn’t give up and a little brother that wouldn’t mind his own business.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It’s Not Easy to Be Me

Flames were licking up the handrails of the stairwell, and, as far as Dean could see, more and more smoke and fire was coming up the stairs.

The staircase would collapse if they didn’t hurry.

“Hang on, kid,” Dean said, staying as close to the floor as possible, to the blond boy in his arms. The boy mumbled something unintelligible through the breathing mask that was connected to the oxygen bottle strapped to Dean’s back. The oxygen in the bottle was running dangerously low.

Dean coughed into the back of his hand. They had to get out soon. He wasn’t going to last long in this smoke. The smoke was getting so thick and heavy that Dean could barely see more than a foot in front of him. The heat was making him dizzy in his body armor as he raced down another flight of stairs.

Shit. He hoped Sam got out okay.

That was when the stairs crumpled under Dean’s feet, and he plunged down.

Dean shot out a hand and barely managed to cling to the remaining stair above him. The jagged edge of hardwood ripped a hole in his glove. The boy nearly tumbled out of his arm, but Dean pushed the boy up to the stair he was holding on to, making him sit down on it. “I got you.”

The boy whimpered, looking down at the fiery abyss below them. The stairway on the lower floors was gone. Dean could hear his heart thundering in his chest. He couldn’t pull himself up from the hole in the stairs; he was getting light-headed from the lack of oxygen. He was losing his grip, and his only thought was that the little boy was going to die without him.

Strong hands gripped Dean by the shoulders. There was a flap of wings; a powerful gust of wind blew through the infernal, temporarily blowing out the fire around them. With another flap, Dean was yanked up from the gaping hole.

“Get the kid,” Dean croaked.

Cas scooped up the boy too, and flew through a crumbling wall. Dean’s heart lurched, and then they were gliding down twelve stories as gracefully as Cas’s wings allowed them.

Cas handed the boy to an EMT, whose jaw hung open at seeing the Angel up close and personal. Cas and Dean were up in the night air again before the EMT could react.

“Where is Sam?”

“He’s waiting at your assembly point,” Cas said, keeping a steady arm around Dean as he flew.

It was like the first time that Cas took Dean flying, back when they were together. It was too fast, too much, and Dean felt like the bottom dropped out of his stomach.

Sam waved at them from the cover of an alley, two blocks away from the burning building. Dean stumbled as soon as they landed. Cas easily let go and stepped away, standing as stiff as a board as Sam ran forwards to hug Dean.

Sam’s hair smelt more than a little singed and the red paint on his armor bore long scratches, but his relieved smile was bright against the soot on his face. “It’s good to see you, Cas.”

“You too, Sam,” Cas said.

“I’m fine, dude.” Dean fended off Sam’s worried check-over, and hissed when Sam squeezed the cut in his palm. Sam pulled out a roll of bandage from his utility belt. Dean said, “How did we do?”

“We can’t always save them all, Dean,” Sam said slowly. Dean’s heart sunk. It didn’t bode well whenever Sam opened a debriefing with a sentence like that.

“A family of four unfortunately perished,” Castiel said. He was looking at where the fire was burning bright two blocks away. Friggin’ superhearing and supervision and supereverything. “The fire brigade is trying to pull them out, but it’s futile.”

Despite the years they spent as Capes, it was never easy to hear that. Sam said, “It wasn’t our fault, Dean.”

“We could’ve saved them if we got there sooner.”

“You did your best,” Cas said. Cas was one of the few Capes that didn’t wear a mask, so it was easy to see Cas looked as serene as ever. Added that to his perfectly tussled hair and pristine white wings, Cas hardly looked like he’d been anywhere near a fire.

Dean couldn’t help saying, “Is that so? And why didn't you save that family, Angel?”

“Really, Dean?” Sam said.

Dean ignored him. “The way I look at it, Sammy and I are just guys with fancy gadgets trying to do some good in a costume, but you, Cas, you’re practically omnipresent. So where were you when that family needed you?”

“I tried, but I had to save a man from jumping to his death before I got Sam’s distress call.” Cas glowered. Dean glared at Sam, who had the grace to look ashamed. “As much as I want to, I can’t be everywhere at once.”

“Then what are you still doing here?” Dean said. “Don’t you have somewhere better to go?”

“You broke up with me because I was ‘never here’,” Cas said stiffly. “Now I’m trying to ‘be here’.”

“Well, too bad,” Dean said. “I don’t offer second chances, man.”

Sam looked nervously between the two of them. They all knew Cas could burn Dean from the insides out with a single wave of his hand if he wanted to, Kevlar armor or not.

But then Cas cocked his head to the side, frowning into the distance. Dean recognized that look on that face. Something massive was happening in some corner of the Earth, but Cas didn’t want to leave because of a discussion they’d gone through a dozen times before.

Dean was tired. “You should go.”

“Dean.”

“Just go, Cas,” Dean said.

Cas didn’t need telling thrice. He spread his wings, and shot straight up into the sky. In a blink, Cas was nothing more than a dot in the sky. In another, he was gone.

“What the hell was that?” Sam said.

“It was nothing,” Dean said, starting to walk back to the alley where they stashed the Impala.

“The hell it was,” Sam said, following Dean. “You two used to be the model Cape couple. I couldn’t look at you two without getting cavities. What happened to you?”

“Keep out of it, Sammy,” Dean said tiredly. They reached the Impala. The cloaking device that Dean invented made the car virtually invisible to the human eye. It was only one of many modifications he made to the car. Dean climbed into the driver seat, and Sam shifted uncomfortably in the passenger seat. It was a tight fit with their Kevlar armor.

“No, I won’t. Not if it is affecting the job,” Sam said, pulling off his mask, while Dean started the engine, and drove. They could put in a few more hours of patrol before sunrise. “I don’t get why you keep chasing him off, Dean.”

Dean sighed inwardly. Sam’s always been the smart one. Nothing got past him. “I’m pissed because he came for me, okay?” Dean said, not looking at Sam. “He didn’t come for the other people that could have died in there, but he saved me.”

Dean could pinpoint the moment when realization struck Sam, as Sam sucked in a quiet breath. “Dean, I’m glad he saved you.”

“I’m not a friggin’ damsel in distress. I know what I’m getting into. I don’t need him wasting time looking out for me,” Dean said, focusing on the road.

“Dean,” Sam said, wearing the sad frown that meant Dean was being unreasonable. “He’s the most powerful being on Earth. I think he can afford a little time to save your ass once in a while.”

“That’s the thing. If he’s so powerful, why didn’t he save those people from the fire?” Dean said. “You heard him, Sam. He can’t be everywhere at once. As much as we want to think otherwise, he’s not Superman.”

It all started with the Hell Knights rampage. The Hell Knights got Dean. Stupid rookie mistake, he should never have walked into that warehouse alone. Long story short, the Hell Knights gave Cas two options: Saved Dean or disarmed the bombs hidden in the city. When Cas burst into the cellar and hugged Dean so tightly he couldn’t breathe, Dean knew Cas would always choose him. As long as they’re together. No one died, but that thought kept Dean up for nights.

“In this business, we don’t get to live long, Sammy,” Dean said. “Cas should be saving other people, not me.”

“You can’t seriously believe that.”

“Yes, I do, and I want to make a clean break,” Dean said. “That’s why I told you not to call him.”

“You didn’t answer me on the comm. link, man, and I couldn’t find you. I thought you were trapped in the fire,” Sam said defensively. “What was I supposed to do?”

Dean didn’t tell Sam how close to the truth he was. “We can’t keep running off to Cas for help, Sammy.”

“I miss working with Cas,” Sam said.

Dean missed running his fingers through Cas’s hair every morning after Cas returned from a quick flight around the city to stretch his wings. He missed ragging on Cas for wearing a pair of dorky glasses as part of his civilian disguise. He missed being carried through the air because Cas was an impatient son of a bitch that refused to wait for Dean to bring the car around.

Sam said, trying one last time, “He loves you, Dean.”

Dean looked up into the night sky through the windshield. He didn’t know where Cas was. The guy might be fighting evil scientists, rescuing people from under falling boulders, or feeding starving children in Africa, but somewhere, somehow, he might still be listening. Dean said, “I don’t.”


End file.
